Do what you can do
I’ve really wanted to write something, anything, on here to inform the world that my little life has changed again, but wasn’t sure I was allowed to. No, I haven’t joined some freaky religious cult or the CIA, but I have entered into new territory, for sure. This new “thing” is surrounded by lots of guidelines, rules and privacy, but apparently I am allowed to discuss my experience without giving too many specific details. SO……
I AM OFFICIALLY A FOSTER MOM!!!
WE ARE A FOSTER FAMILY!!!!
This process has been over a year in the works and much longer in my heart before we ever officially knocked on the door of The Children’s Aid Society of Hamilton and said, “What do we need to do to care for children that really need a home?”.
There have been lots of hoops to jump through and at times I have wondered if there would ever be an end to all the interviews, training, and safety checks. I have continued to see the notices in our local paper that the CAS is in desperate need of foster parents, and found myself thinking, “We’re right here!” I have prayed, “God, when will this process be DONE already?”. I have kept my excitement at arm’s length for over 13 months, trying to patiently (ahem) accept that these things take time.
And now, She is here. And She is absolutely the one we were meant to have first. I brought her home from the hospital just days after her birth, marveling that her name means “God’s messenger”, knowing that when I look at her I am seeing God’s hand at work in her life and ours.
But here’s the thing. I’m sort of getting annoyed about something, something I didn’t anticipate….the response of all those I come into contact with that are oohhing and aahhing over Her and then turn to me and say emphatically over and over again, “I could never do that.” or “I could never give her up after having her from birth like that.” or “It’s going to be so difficult when she goes.” or “This is going to be so tough on your family.”
I am kind in my responses. I am, I promise.
But in my head, I get onto my soapbox and want to say, “Well, I didn’t become a foster mom because I thought, “I will have no trouble giving up a child, I’m pretty calloused and aloof with my own kids, so, hey why not?” NO, OF COURSE NOT!
I really want to tell these people that it’s time we start making decisions not based on our fears of the future, but on our faith in our God.
If you are a Christian, if the spirit of the living God dwells inside you, if the same spirit that raised Christ from the dead inflates your mortal body, then I have some good news for you…
YOU CAN DO HARD THINGS.
Yes, you.
You don’t have to stay on the path of least resistance. In fact, the Bible pretty clearly says that life is hard and that we shouldn’t seek to isolate ourselves from troubles and difficulties. Those nuisances are simply part of living on this planet, but we do not need to live in FEAR of them. When the Bible says in Romans that we are more than conquerors, I am pretty sure it means we have been equipped to go out and fight and win some difficult battles. How else can we conquer something unless there is struggle and learning and challenge?
I will most likely be a wreck when the time comes for Her to move on from our home. Absolutely. But I would not trade these moments of caring for Her in for a more comfortable, safe life. I am choosing to believe the Word of God that says I can do ALL things, even this, through Christ who strengthens me.
She is my starfish, my first one (http://www.starrbrite.com/starfish.html), and this makes a difference for Her. Thank you, Jesus, for your strengthening. I am so honored to have Her.
I don’t think foster parenting is for everyone. (Although, if you think it might be for you, BY ALL MEANS, contact your Children’s Aid office immediately! Oh, the need is so great.)
But I can’t help but think that Jesus might be asking you, “Then what WILL you do, if not this?”
We can do hard things. We just have to stop thinking we can’t.
Please, do what you can do.
Everyday Spectacular 
Carrie and Pastor Jeff, as a former foster child (and foster sister) I thank you from the bottom of my heart for following your heart and God’s desire for your family. Too often we hear about kids in third world countries that need our help or adopted, and while that is true, we also have a huge number of children across our own country and neighbourhoods who need a loving family to call their own. I know she will do well and prosper in your home and I bless your whole family in this new and amazing journey!
Jenn
Mark 9:37
Whosoever shall receive one of such children in my name, receiveth me: and whosoever shall receive me, receiveth not me, but him that sent me.
Hi Carrie,
Thanks so much for posting this! I so agree that if He calls us to do something He equips us to complete the task. More people need to discover the blessing in obedience even when we aren’t comfortable with the risks involved. This morning I read about Abrahams obedience with his son Isaac. God always provides what we need when we stretch ourselves in faith!
Congrats! I’m very proud of you. I gave a child up at the age of 19 and then was adopted by the family. I’m grateful that she also went into a Christian home. I thank God everyday for people such as you and Pastor Jeff taking on this journey to touch and guide a child with so much to offer. Afterall she is from God! God Bless you and your family. I believe God has a plan and He will give the ‘instructions’ and ‘guidance along your journey!
Congratulations – Way to go Carrie and Jeff – so proud to know you. I know you will deposit well spring of life into her that will be with her for her lifetime! xo
YES!!! So excited and happy you answered the call to foster! You are a wonderful family. This little girl is so blessed. Love you all. Hope to meet her sometime in the nearish future!
Carrie, this is great news!!! So excited for you guys. And what a lucky little lady to be cared for by your awesome family.
Also, I absolutely love what you’ve shared here… SO TRUE! We can do hard things. Well said. 🙂
Carrie, So nicely said…You are fulfilling another part of God’s call on your life!
I get the “I couldn’t do that” about the number of my children more than I’m comfortable with….. I can relate to that part, at least.
As encouragement to the people who look at a sacrifice of this nature being taken on by this family, I want to encourage you:
Remember that God himself took the ultimate risk on us. Despite our freedom of choice for or against us, he still saw us worth the risk. The price He paid was the highest price I can think of. Given that I’m not sure any of us could hand pick a child of ours that we would willingly give for others; given that I know the pain of losing a child, I don’t know that I could have found the courage for such a risk. And yet, He was the ultimate example of being able to put yourself on the line for someone else. He’d have done it for each of us as individuals.
And it’s not about us anyway. It’s about Him. It’s about moving forward with the God given desires in our heart, knowing that faith doesn’t mean he saves you from pain, but that you can trust Him to walk you through it. Sometimes you just don’t know the full breadth of what God has put in you until you first make yourself available to do what no one else will do.
Carrie,
You’re risking your heart for this one, because God says she’s worth it. Each of them will be. I couldn’t be more proud of you.
Jen, Your kind words brought tears to my eyes. Thank you, my friend.
Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.
James 1:26-27 (in Context) James 1 (Whole Chapter)
I think that children whose parents can not look after them fall into this category. You’re doing as God asks.